For many teens, being part of a sport’s team is an integral part of their school experience. If your teen has grown up being involved in sports, part of their identity is being a soccer player, swimmer, cross country runner etc. Many of their friendships have stemmed from being on a sports team. Being part of a team gives them a sense of purpose, and they enjoy having a physical competitive outlet. Unfortunately, at many schools, making the school’s teams is not guaranteed. The thought of being cut and not making the team is a real possibility and throws many teens into The Chronic Stress Loop.
If your teen is feeling stressed, it can negatively impact their ability to perform well. Even if they have the skills to make the team, their nerves might cause them to make silly errors and get cut. Below are typical panicked thoughts that might be running WITHOUT interference in a teen’s mind who is stressed about tryouts.
Negative Mindset:
- I am so nervous that I am going to get cut. I am going to feel like such a loser.
- I am not as good as ________. I am never going to make the team.
- I am not ________ (tall, quick, experienced) enough. I might as well not even show up.
Luckily I have three great strategies to help your teen switch off the negative dialogue in their head, so they can show up to tryouts confident and ready to do their best.
#1 The Sandwich Technique:
The Sandwich Technique is a form of the Emotional Freedom Technique or tapping that can quickly decrease stress. (If you are new to tapping, you can learn more about the technique here.) The Sandwich Technique consists of a set up statement and three rounds of tapping. The beauty of The Sandwich Technique is that in under five minutes, your teen can go from panicked and stressed to calm and at ease.
The first round your teen taps on negative emotions. The second round your teen alternates between negative and positive emotions. The third round your teen taps in a positive emotion.
Step 1: Rate the intensity of the stressor on a scale from 1 (low) to 10 (high).
Step 2: Create a Set Up Statement. Repeat 3 times while tapping on the karate chop point. (Pick one to repeat or use all three examples once.)
- Even though I am really stressed about making the team, I fully and completely accept myself anyway.
- Even though I am worried I am not as good as _________, I fully and completely accept myself anyway.
- Even though I am worried that I am too ______ (slow, short, inexperienced), I fully and completely accept myself anyway.
Step 3: Tap through the 8 points three times.
Round 1 Phrase:
- I am so stressed that I might get cut from the _______ team.
Round 2 Phrase: Alternate between these two statements.
- I am so stressed that I might get cut from the ______ team.
- I am ready to do my best, and I choose to release this stress.
Round 3 Phrase:
- I am awesome at _______, and I will do my best each and everyday.
Step 4: Check back in with the intensity of the stress. Rate the intensity of the stressor on a scale from 1 (low) to 10 (high). After one round, hopefully your teen’s stress has decreased and they are feeling more at ease. If the intensity is still high, they can continue to tap until it is decreased to a five or below.
Positive Mantra Practice:
Once your teen has released some of the stress with tapping, another great strategy to boost confidence is to develop a positive affirmations practice.
#2 Negative Thought Blaster:
Instead of your teen constantly repeating what they don’t want to happen at tryouts, throughout their day, whenever they catch themselves having a negative thought, they repeat their positive mantra three times. (Sample mantras below)
- I am skilled player and a good teammate. I will be an asset to the team.
- I am an experienced player, and I will be an asset to the team.
- I am looking forward to tryouts. I will have fun and do my best.
- I am excited to learn and participate in tryouts.
#3 Think Up App:
The Think Up App is a great tool that allows your teen to record their mantras. Then, before they go to bed each night, or whenever they need a confidence boost during the day, they can listen to their mantras. The Think Up App allows your teen to set their personal mantras to relaxing music. In addition,they can set a timer so the mantas automatically shut off. Listening to mantras through the Think Up App is a great practice to boost your teen’s confidence and put them at ease as they drift off to sleep.
Today your teen’s top stressor might be making a sports team, but in a couple of weeks something else might pop up. The Sandwich Technique and developing a positive mantra practice are two great strategies no matter what your teen’s top stressor might be. To learn more about how stress negatively impacts teens and how you can help them be more at ease, grab a copy of my FREE Stress Less Guide here.
(The Think Up App is free. The link above is an affiliate link, so if you choose to make a purchase within the App. I receive a percentage with no additional cost to you)